Day ten, I need a boost of adrenalin

Today is day ten of being on Lyrica and I feel like complete and utter crap. I'm in so much pain that I can't even tie up my hair because my arms get so weak. I dislocated my right ankle tonight and I'm in terrible agony. I couldn't even use my crutches because I couldn't bare any weight on my left leg, let alone my right. Mum had to wheel me down the hallway to the bedroom in my wheelchair, it's a tight squeeze but we made it. I feel like a failure, what kind of parent should have to deal with a child with disabilities when they have their own pain? It makes me so upset, I don't know what i would ever do with out my mum, she means everything to me. My left and right ankles were severly painful today, my right hip, leg an right shoulders, left and right elbows and right wrist, temporal mandibular and lower lumba pain, as you can tell from the list..pain was scheduled to rise today. I wish I could do the things I love, go outside without being stared at for being in a wheelchair and just to feel like a normal kid my age. People don't understand how to cherish the little things in life, like riding a bike or flying a kite, until those privileges get snatched away from them. It makes me terribly sad to see other people in pain. Today, mum wheeled me to the grocery store and as we went past several people having conversations, they paused and stared at me. It's a terrible, terrible feeling to be examined by complete strangers, labelled as a retard or a freak. People don't understand ehlers danlos syndrome. One day you can be walking around having fun, playing baseball and the next day you're in a wheelchair, on crutches, in a sling or wrapped in bandages. I can't even eat dinner without my jaw sliding out of place continuously. People just don't understand, that some people may looks perfectly fine but they can have such debilitating diseases. Things like the conditions I have will NEVER get better, you can reduce the impact it may have on your life, but you can't rid it from your life. It's hides in the shadows and jumps out to test your faith and strength to keep going. Sometimes and injury can heal in a few hours or days, Sometimes weeks, months and years. I often wonder what the highest age is that someone lives to with having eds/RSD/CRPS when every form of medication, technique and mental strength ceases to help. How does anyone live past 15, let alone 80 something. Chronic pain affects you mostly physically and mentally/emotionally. Tomorrow, my friend is going to take me to the beach in my wheelchair for some fresh air. I'm hoping I can get out of my chair and sit in the sand and rub it over my legs to desensitize them. I feel CRPS pain in my legs so I think it's a good idea to nail it on the head before It gets worse. Oh well, I'll see how it goes. Hopefully it will be a great day, without storms!